Truth be told, I don’t have a grand story about waking up one morning feeling like a new woman eating fully free. But I will say, quite positively, it seems like shifting my way of relating to eating and to myself was a progression of openings. My first real opening began with a “maybe.” “Maybe there are other ways that I can eat that can bring me peace of mind.” Even considering a different possibility was huge. Personal evolution often first begins with an opening to the possibility of something else. In client work we join forces to open doorways to new possibilities. Sometimes simple. Sometimes radical. I track a new vision with my client, feel it out with her, refine it as needed, and figuratively place it on our altar during our time together. Because you and I are not sitting across from one another right now, I’d love to offer a little ‘possibility practice’ for you to mull over. Here are three musings to help open you to newer possibilities (Written in the “I” form for you to try on as a little self-mantra and see which, if any, fit for you personally) On Body Weight Certainty: When I attach to what I think my body’s healthiest weight is with absolute certainty, I tend to feel anxious and suffer. Truth be told, I don’t actually know with real certainty what’s my body’s natural healthiest weight is right now. But I do get to focus on my real job in all this: how I actually care for this body, what I feed it, and doing my best to seek out life-affirming circumstances of all kinds. When I focus on what’s my real job, I can get a better sense of what my body actually is. Depending on how tightly I am clinging,, this may require a real surrender and drop of ego arrogance that has me feeling like I am in control of Nature. Ponder: Maybe I can let go a little bit, just care for myself, and let my body do it’s thing. On the Taboo of Weight Loss & Feminism: I have the freedom to fully own my desire to lose weight. I’m not a bad person for wanting to lose weight. This does not make me a failure to feminism. My feminism is evolving and growing to contain ALL aspects and faces of The Feminine. I am carving out space for all parts and desires to be known and addressed as consciously as I can. If my desire to lose weight feels burdened by anxiety, like a lot of self-worth is on the line, or like I cannot tolerate this current body, then I am willing to see that that that’s not real freedom. I’ve got some inner work to do. The more I strengthen my Knowing of Who I Really Am, the more relaxed I will feel with the natural fluctuation of body weight. If I get too attached to the outer form, I’ll likely know because I will start feeling anxious and controlling Ponder: Maybe it’s not a failure to want to lose weight. Maybe I can create space to feel out this desire and gain some great insight. On Healthful Eating: Healthful eating includes eating in ways that are supportive for my body, my mind, my biography, my current life circumstances, the health of the planet. I understand this is individual. Healthful for someone unaffected by perfectionistic enerrgy might mean eating more vegetables and planning meals more. Healthful for a perfectionist might mean consciously blending “health” foods and “pleasure” foods, or planning a little less. Healthful for someone who has been focusing exclusively on weight or personal interests exclusively, may find integrating a communal or global focus on food an eating as quite healthful. A woman who tends to put everyone’s needs in her community above her own, may find enhanced “health” in making herself breakfast and dinner most days. Ponder: Maybe part of my definition of “healthy” eating could include an energy that I’ve been keeping on the periphery for a while. I’d love to know what sort of “maybe” you are getting an intuitive hit would be a good opening for you…Feel free to respond below. With love, Laura And yay, class is coming up! Join me for a community tele-class, Eating for Energy, on Wednesday, February 22nd at 7pm EST. $15 Details here.
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