Is your comfort zone keeping you from the body you desire?
Does life feel pretty good, yet for some reason food or weight seems to be the one thing that still feels like a struggle? Perhaps you’ve wanted to start lifting weights but time never seems to allow it. Maybe you feel tired all the time or have more “important” matters to tend to. Or maybe you’d like to commit to eating better, but for some reason you find yourself picking out chips or sweets at the grocery store. It could feel like a case of chronic self-sabotage. You say you want something really great for yourself but your actions don’t seem to line up. It would be easy to think you lack adequate discipline, but I am here to offer you one of several possibilities around why you just can’t seem to get where you’d like to go. The “Upper Limit Problem” Everyone has what Gay Hendriks calls an “upper limit problem” – a specific amount of happiness or success that we can tolerate comfortably. Anything beyond that can push us beyond our natural set point for feeling good. We then, unconsciously, create a challenging circumstance that brings us back to our natural comfort zone. Sometimes we pick fights. Sometimes we procrastinate. And sometimes we create challenges with food. Falling into your pattern I see this happen occasionally when a client begin to get close to their goal. For example, Lucy starts feeling really great about her eating habits and her body is responding beautifully. Then, “out of the blue” she reports falling into a pattern of eating congesting foods and feels bloated and frustrated. She feels she has to start all over again. Comfy, cozy struggle Many people are most comfortable with some degree of struggle in their lives. There is a belief that without struggle it’s not really worth it, or the belief that anything worth attaining should be hard. Yes, it certainly is gratifying to work toward our goals and feel our hard work has paid off, but the feeling that struggle MUST accompany success or happiness, would make anyone feel uncomfortable when things feel “too easy.” Fitting In vs. Fitting Out Also keep in mind that it is much easier to fit in than it is to fit out. As you begin to do nice things for yourself, you may be stepping away from patterns that are familiar to you and others in your immediate world. You may start feeling really good. This has the potential to throw everyone through a loop. Falling into familiar patterns can feel much more comfortable and non-threatening. So what does this have to with shape-shifting into the body you desire? If you believe struggle is necessary, is it possible you are creating a complicated relationship with food or body weight to support your belief that things must be hard? Lots of food for thought, I know. Today I am not giving you a set of steps or strategies. I am simply encouraging you to examine your capacity and tolerance for feeling good. What limiting beliefs are holding you back from what you desire? What would it take for you to allow more goodness into your life? Wishing you a beautiful holiday season. With love, Laura